my blog

So you might wonder why I came back to my blog, and it's really quite simple.

My blog is exactly like my life, no one cares about it.

I come here to rant and rave, mainly to get stuff off my chest, and that's about it

Right now my life completely sucks
The whole car thing started this off, and it seems like everytime something big and bad happens to me, everything else in my life goes wrong.

So my car breaks down, I'm pissed off beyond all belief and people keep asking me why Im so sad, that's fine, granted. But then they keep picking at it, eventho they can see I'm sad and really don't want to talk. These are people who really really mean alot to me, probly the closest group of 'friends' I've had since I moved to surrey. Mammi, daddi, and daughter. It's sad to think of it, but they really are my best friends, which means I've never found good friends in the 5 years I've been living here. Pitiful...

So I had a rugby game today, and I love rugby, and was so excited for the game. Early in the game a got stomped, hard on my knee. I roughed it out, barely be able to walk but wanting to stay in the game. It felt better after the game but as of the time I'm blogging this, i can barely stand on it

Next, at work tonight, there's this girl. She means soo much to me and I couldn't imagine a life without her. She was supposed to come in at 5 but never showed up. We had no idea where she was. I was so worried that something could have happened to her, I don't know what I would have done if that was true. I didn't like to think of it, but I thought of what would have done if someone had done something to her. I think I may have killed them. No exageration. Finally though she came in, it was just a miscommunication

But that put me into a bad mood, back to full depression syndrome.

So now I'm at home, the same thing happened tonight. As much as I try to act normal, they can tell something is up, and they keep asking and asking what it is that's bothering me. I don't like to show my sadness, I like to be the good guy, but sometimes that's just too hard. They must just all think I'm an asshole now

All of this has brought me to this last thing, that always seems to come up when I'm in this state. I have no true friends. No one who I can talk to about this. The person I want to talk is always busy, and that's about it in that category.

So I'm resorting to blogging my sadness away. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day, but it won't...

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]